Art Posted April 20, 2006 Report Share Posted April 20, 2006 Both are very funny. Can't wait to see what happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiggAndyy Posted April 20, 2006 Report Share Posted April 20, 2006 Cut to artillery range: Two soldiers are are finalizing the details of the morning exercize. Lt: "Sgt., the aircraft will approach over hill 209 due east of this position. This is a 'low tech' exercize and there will be no computer assist, strictly hands on." Sgt: "The sun glare is pretty bad this morning, sir. " Lt: "There is a 15 mile buffer zone between your target and the nearest structure behind it. The C-130 will be flying the treetops so your men won't see the aircraft until it crests the hilltop, and that leaves you with a firing window of only 10,000 yards so be prepared to fire as soon as it comes into view. Don't worry about what is behind your target." Sgt: "Yes, sir. Will there be a flight crew on board?" Lt: "Of course not. Part of this excercize includes the aircrew abandoning the aircraft just as it begins to climb hill 209." Sgt: "Isn't that cutting it a bit close, sir? I mean, if we are not on target won't the aircrew be in the line of fire of our anti-aircraft barrage? And if we miss won't the aircraft crash uncontrolably?" Lt: "This is a "live fire" exercize, soldier. And if you should miss the aircraft after it passes overhead a self destruct will drop it a mile behind us. Is everything understood?" Sgt: "Yes, sir!" Lt: "Carry on and good luck." Sgt (under his breath as the Lt turns and leaves): "Damn, sucks to be whoever is on board that plane." Cut to inside the C-130 cock-pit where the two pilots go through the pre-flight checklist. Pilot 1: "Everything checks out except for the engines. Where is Shorty so we can get the rest of this list done?" Pilot 2: "I'm not sticking my neck out for him this time. We have to get over to strip 7, the visitors tour flight is set to take off at 0945, some sort of film crew or something. This thing is going to get blown to hell in a few minutes anyway, so what if there is a glitch here or there." Pilot 1: "Yeah. Shorty isn't going to get out of this screw up, though. Too bad, I was looking forward to taking a big portion of that money at poker next week." Pilot 2: "HA! Yeah, he can't play for crap." The pilots climb out of the crew hatch and leave for strip 7. Heading away from the aircraft they never notice the impatient TV crew now packed tight inside the massive cargo hold of the soon to be doomed C-130. Fade to inside the cargo hold of the C-130. Large Andyyy and Kattt don't do well in confined areas with each other. Kattt: "You said we would be underway by now. You said Shorty would be here. You said everything would be fine. You said this would be a great way to help build morale. You said there would be a breakfast table. You said you could fit into that old flight suit of yours. You said you had everything under control..." Andyyy begins to swirl his head and roll his eyes and clamp his hands over his ears. LA (groaning): rrr- rrrrrr-rrrrrr arrrrghhh... bitch, bitch, moan, moan, Shut the hell up for once in your life!" Kattt smiles a crooked evil grin and just broods in her chair. The rest of the film crew have long ago grown accustomed to these childish outbursts from the both of them. The running bet with the crew was that Andyyy would either wind up shooting Kattt or marrying her, either outcome would be about the same for the both of them. Andyyy stomps over to the edge of the cargo ramp and another zipper pops open from his former flight suit that he tried to cram over his ample postieror and beer gut. LA: "Stupid zipper." Andyyy grabs his cellphone again can calls for the 15th time that morning. This time a voice answers the other end. Shorty: "WHAT??? Do you know what time it is?" LA: "YES I KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS, Shorty!!!! Do you?" Shorty: "No, that is why I was aksing. And stop yelling. Who is this?" LA: "Large Andyyy and Kattt you pickled amnesiac! WE are here on the plane at the airfield. Where the hell are you?" And buy the way, it is 8:15 in the morning RIGHT NOW!" Shorty: "CRAP!" *click* The phone line goes dead. Andyyy turns to Kattt and rolls his eyes. Kattt: "I'm glad you two weren't at Normandy." LA: "Shut up and help me with this zipper." Kattt: "Gross..." TO BE CONTINUED Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted April 20, 2006 Report Share Posted April 20, 2006 Cats don't have opposing thumbs--how do ya' figure that little zipper trick worked?!? TEETH?!?!? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
josemartins Posted April 21, 2006 Author Report Share Posted April 21, 2006 Uh-oh, Andy seems to have acquired the "taste" of it.... ...but... ...if he starts a "Blog", everybody is going to put the blame on me, right? Jose Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat Posted April 25, 2006 Report Share Posted April 25, 2006 It's tempting to right another chapter...but then it would really be the Andyyy and Kattt Hour, wouldn't it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
josemartins Posted May 2, 2006 Author Report Share Posted May 2, 2006 Entries thread closed! Thank you! Jose Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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